Here begins the 2 week wait

So on Friday things looked good indeed with 1 follicle on the left at 21 and another at 15 (likely not mature). My estradial was 504 but LH was still low at 5.8.

I was instructed to trigger Friday night and go for gold 36 hours later (which was this morning and we are staying at my in-laws this weekend...haha).

So now the 2 weeks of complete neurosis begins. No symptoms yet...lol!

If my beta is two weeks from tomorrow then I will test the day before at home because that is my birthday! But I have a feeling my beta will be Friday the 5th.

Day 10-16 update

This cycle had a very slow start but things appear to be looking up!

CD10 U/S and Bloodwork: Here is a brief recap of the conversation (both spoken and unspoken) at the monitoring appointment...

u/s tech (in a incredulous tone): "How long are your cycles?"
Me (in a nervous uncomfortable tone): "Unmedicated they are very long, medicated they are around 32-35 days, why?"
Me in my head: "Nice to meet you too lady, you just violated me with your camera and now are freaking me out with your questions!"
u/s tech: "Honey you have a loooong way to go. I'd be surprised if I saw you back here anytime soon"
Me: "Are you seeing anything?"
Me in my head: "Sweet hey-soos, is the cycle over already"
u/s tech: "I need to finish my measurements in peace before I can tell you anything"
Me (feebly): "take your time"

Turns out while I was not as far along as most are on Day 10, the world was not ending. Results were:

Estradial: 195
LH: 6.7
Left ovary: 1 follicle at 12mm and 7 <10mm
Right ovary: 1 follicle at 11mm, 1 follicle at 10mm and 12 <10mm
Lining: 7.2

So I was instructed to go back for another "date" on Monday (CD12).

Monday I had a wonderful u/s tech who got very excited about everything she was seeing and loved to talk about what she was seeing (which was great for me!!). She said things were progressing slowly and I was a ways away from O time.

Results:
Estradial: 204
LH: 7.8
Left ovary: 1 follicle at 12.5mm and 9 <10mm
Right ovary: 1 follicle at 10.5mm, 1 follicle at 10mm and 11 <10mm
Lining: 7.3

So not much progress from Day 10...I was instructed to go back yesterday (Thursday or CD15).
At yesterdays appt, I had a third u/s tech who was right in the middle in terms of style of the two mentioned above. She was not chatty and didn't offer any real-time explanations but she would answer my questions, which was nice. And lo and behold there was some action!!

Results:
Estradial: ??? (haven't spoken to the nurse to actually get the numbers)
LH: ???
Left ovary: 1 follicle at 18.5mm
Right ovary: 2 follicle at 10mm
Lining: 10.3

I was instructed to go back this morning. I was lucky enough to get the wonderful chatty u/s tech from CD12 again!! I am still waiting on the bloodwork results but I do know this:

Left ovary: 1 follicle at 20mm, 1 follicle at 15mm (where the heck did this one come from!!)
Right ovary: 2 follicles at 10mm
Lining: 11.5

So this is exciting! I am not sure whether I will trigger tonight or go in again tomorrow but hopefully the nurse will call soon.

I'll be back with an update soon!

update

Today is day 7 so things should be quiet with respect to this cycle but I feel like they have been anything but!!

First off I had my first experience with the vag cam last Saturday. It was interesting. I felt like a pro and a rookie all at the same time. On the pro hand, I kept thinking that I would just know what to do and what I would see because I have read so many other people's experiences. Of course, in reality I was a rookie--I couldn't make out a single thing the tech was showing me.
The results came back ok though I need to do some research to find out if these are normal.
My lining was 3.7 and I had 20 very small follicles on the right and 10 on the left.
My estradial level (day 3) was 91. My quick research indicates this is on the high side. The nurse said everything was fine and to start the Clomid.

The BIGGEST fiasco thus far is that I forgot to take the frigging Clomid on Day 5!!!! I usually take it just before bed but the excitement of the Olympics threw me off and I totally forgot. I remembered at 4:30 am and of course jumped up and took it right away. I really hope that doesn't screw things up.

I go back on Saturday (day 10) for my next u/s and bloodwork. Hopefully, there will be some progress.

Thank you! and Update

Thank you VERY much for all your comments and condolences on the bust cycle. The support and advice makes this difficult journey so much more bearable. I have thought a lot over the past few days about whether getting my hopes up during a cycle is a good, bad, necessary, foolish, etc. thing to do. I haven't come to any conclusions of course. It definitely makes the negative outcomes harder but I think for me it makes the cycle as a whole easier. Of course it becomes harder and harder to think positively as times goes on.

I am feeling much better today as I spoke with my doctor and made a plan I am pleased with for this cycle. I am going to increase my Clomid to 100mg and do a monitored cycle. I will go in tomorrow morning for a CD3 ultrasound and bloodwork. Then I will go back on Day 10 and depending on the results every day or every few days after that until ovulation.

The other nice thing is that my OB uses an Infertility Center to do all the monitoring so I will get a chance to preview one of the big reproductive science centers in the area.

So tomorrow is my first date with the famous u/s wand! I will keep you all posted...

From 4 weeks PG to 0...just like that

Yesterday's digital test and this mornings beta both emphatically confirmed Cycle17 is a BIG FAT BUST.

I really had no "symptoms" this time save for the very mild cramping and extreme bloat. Except for yesterday when I managed to convince myself that the nausea I had all day was surely a good sign. In fact, I let myself get so hopeful that I tested yesterday afternoon on a digital test I had lying around. You would think the resounding NOT PREGNANT would have been enough for me to start moving on to the next cycle. But no...I convinced myself it was too early for an accurate result and that it wasn't first morning urine. Surely this morning would bring me different news...

Yeah right, all that big fat hope got me was a big fat negative beta. Hey I should look on the "bright" side...at least that means no more yucky suppositories for a few weeks...

So now the question is what to do next cycle. I think I am going to ask for a higher dose of Clomid. I know that the 50mg has worked in the sense that it causes me to ovulate (something that eludes me naturally). However, I am ovulating almost a week later than the textbook day 14. I am feeling as though it may be an egg quality issue given it is so late in the cycle.

I also have taken Clomid on CD5-9. I wonder about going with the CD3-7 cycle. Will that make me ovulate sooner? What are the downsides?

Thirdly, I will ask for monitoring. Its a really busy time for me at work and so I am a bit scared about trying to add in additional appointments. But I want to at least ask.

Finally, I am wondering whether I should find/make an appt with an RE. I figure there might be a long wait to get in and that will give me another 1-2 cycles with my OBs office. Anyone know any good REs in the Boston area?

Self-inflicted insanity for sanity!

In a moment of either complete sanity or insanity depending on how you look at it I begged the doctor to push my beta back...

I just heard from the doctor this morning about the results of my progesterone test on Friday. My levels were 11 which indicates ovulation (yay!) but is MUCH lower than during my last cycle (during which the level was 30). Without having a medical degree myself, my educated guess is that the test was done a lot earlier this time. Last cycle I got a positive OPK on a Saturday and went in for the blood test on the following Friday. This time I got a positive OPK on Monday and went in on Friday. So it was two days "closer" to ovulation. In any case I don't think it matters all that much as I am now on progesterone supplements anyway.

However, if my ovulation was either the day after the positive or two days after the positive then I am thinking I am 5-6 dpo right now. My doctor said to come in on Friday for a beta, which would mean I would be 9-10 dpo. This just seemed to early for my comfort. I know that its possible to get a positive (certainly a positive beta) at 9-10 dpo but given what happened last time I just don't want to worry about low levels and all that. So waiting until Monday will make me feel better with the result but it prolongs the agonizing wait! Hence the self-inflicted insanity for sanity!!

Just to add to the insanity, here is my start of the "symptom" list:

4-5 dpo: Crampy feeling, heartburn (though I have been eating like shite), not sleeping well
5-6 dpo: Crampy, heartburn, still not sleeping well

I have now taken 3 100mg progesterone suppositories. I don't think I am having any side-effects (but for the crampiness mentioned on the symptom list, oh yeah and the itching!!). No sore breasts yet...

So far, so ok?!

I have been meaning to make time to write about how this cycle is going and how I am feeling about things but work is so darn busy!

Today is day 21 and I finally got a positive reading via OPK on day 19. So I should have ovulated either yesterday or today. Needless to say there has been a lot of lovin' in our house these past few days.

I am a little concerned about how late it is in the cycle. I know its not terribly late but I wonder whether the egg quality is affected by the later ovulation. Last cycle I got a positive OPK on day 17 so its only two days later.

On Friday I will go in for bloodwork to test my progesterone levels to see if ovulation actually occurred. I will also start progesterone (vag supplements) on Friday as well. So keep your fingers crossed that Y's sperm are busy violating my egg! (yikes that sounds yucky).

So now the dreaded 2 week wait begins, though with things as busy as they are it should go by quickly.

In other related news, the toll of pregnant coworkers had grown to 14!! I work in a smallish company and this is definitely the highest number of people in this office to be expecting ever. I kid you not there has been less than 14 births in the company probably in the last 5 years total...

The calm before the storm

My last post feels like forever ago even though it was only a week. Last week was super busy and a bit stressful at work. I have a ton of projects right now and one is about to kick in to super busy mode. I am quite scared actually. Its a really big deal project for me and could make or break whether I get promoted in December. I feel excited about the project but also feel like I am going to crap my pants just thinking about the amount of work to be done/manage. August will be insanely crazy and I will be potentially be 4-8 weeks pregnant (assuming this cycle works)! Yikes.

Cycle-wise things are going along. Today is day 12 and I finished my Clomid on Friday. Today I start peeing on the OPK stick until that beautiful smiley face shows up. Last cycle I would POTS (pee on the stick) first thing in the morning (per my doctors orders) however, after reading lots of helpful posts/info from all of you (and other Nesties) I feel more comfortable with the accuracy by doing it in the afternoon this time around. However, that requires me to POTS at work. I am really bad at literally peeing on the stick and usually have to pee into a receptacle of sorts and then dip the stick. So I brought a J.ello pudding snack to work and I will eat it, clean the cup, and later this afternoon use it to assist with my peeing.

Thanks for the info re: the monitoring. I did not even end up asking for it because work was so busy last week that I never called the doctor to ask for it. I will call her today to ask about the progesterone as I need to get a prescription for that and figure out when to start taking it.

I have been reading everyones' blogs I just haven't had much time for posting. (Thank god for the Black,berry and the morning/evening commute, nice blog reading time!). I did want to send some positive thoughts out to Chell who is growing a city of eggs and dealing with some awful OHSS. I hope your retrieval goes well tomorrow and that everything works out ok with the fluid/sickness.

Every weekend should be a 3-day one!

Long weekends are so nice. I really think that work weeks should be 4 days and weekends should be 3 days long. People overall would be much happier I think!

We had a nice weekend, watched the Bosto.n Po.ps and fireworks show. The fireworks were really good though after a while there is so much smoke you can't see the fireworks very well. Yesterday we went to Wal,den Pond for a quick swim and relaxed on the shore for a bit. It was really nice.

Today is day 1 of Clomid. It hasn't arrived in the mail yet but should come this morning. Last time on Clomid, I had no side effects so I am hoping for the same this time!

Has anyone ever done a monitored Clomid cycle? How does it work? How often/when were you monitored?

What a lovely surprise!

Yesterday was CD1 of cycle 17!!! It came out of nowhere (temps are still high and no spotting) but it is here and for once welcome!!

I reordered my Clomid (50mg) and will start that on Monday (CD5-9). I really wanted to demand a monitored cycle this time to make sure that my lining isn't thining and have a better idea of how the medication is working but I didn't get to talk to the IF nurse because she is off for the July 4th holiday. I will speak with her on CD 6 but I am not sure if it is too late to begin monitoring.

I also need to ask her about the progesterone and when I will start that.

It feels really great to be back in the swing of things. I am also trying "The Sec.ret" with this cycle (power of positive thinking) so this cycle will work and I will be pregnant with a healthy baby in 4 weeks (or 2 going by fertilization).